The actor on his early experiences in front of the camera, his take on aspirations, the role that challenged him, and more…
Edited excerpts:
Would you say your fear of the camera went away very early because your dad put you in front of it as a child?
To be very honest, I don’t remember the first shot or when I saw the lights. It’s weird, no? Because, if you ask any actor, they would remember all those things. I feel very embarrassed about not remembering. I say that’s a blessing, but it’s still weird.
I’ve always wondered why an actor of such immense talent isn’t at a higher place. And I’m asking this in a very positive way.
A lot of people have asked me that question. My problem is that I didn’t believe in reaching certain heights. If we take anything, for example: if I bought a cycle, I would feel that it’s less when compared to a motorcycle. I would feel the same way about a motorcycle and car too. I understood that from a very young age. So, however big I go, there is going to be somebody bigger than me. What if I go to Hollywood? What next after that? I think today people are running behind the need to be a big person. I don’t understand that. I think doing my job perfectly makes me a big person. In between, I thought of leaving all this and going to the Himalayas or something on a spiritual quest. Once you understand that this is not the reality, that it’s all fake, you lose the connection with all these superficial things.
What was the role that challenged you?
The father’s role in Silambattam. I was very young at that time and didn’t know whether people would accept me as a father. By ‘challenge’, I don’t mean the acting, but to convince the audience that this very skinny guy is a rowdy who beats up people for money. It’s not a joke. I had put on some weight for it or a black dress, a beard…
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